In the movie “Seven Days in Utopia,” Robert Duvall’s character shares a nugget of wisdom with the young golf player whose career has just blown up. He shares,
“The toughest challenge you’ll face isn’t your competitors scores, it’s that casual comment offered by someone, anyone, about how you should be doing it. If you don’t have conviction about what your foundation is, that off-handed comment will take you out of your game and erode your confidence.”
Wow. Has that ever happened to you? Someone makes a casual comment about what you’re doing and it causes you to question everything you know. Well, when he shared that on the movie, it literally brought tears to my eyes. Just two days prior, a well meaning person uttered one of those “casual comments” that rocked me to the core. What they said wasn’t about what I was doing, but rather what I SHOULD be doing in their eyes. It took me aback, it made me angry, it made me question everything that I am and am pursuing. I don’t know why some comments have the power to unnerve us and knock us off our game, but they do. Those questions are the kind that make you ponder and think through your goals, beliefs, and convictions.
That’s exactly what happened to me. As I began to let the doubt and questioning sink in, I sorted through lots of different emotions in getting to the bottom of my actions. Why are we pursuing some large business goals? Why am I involved in these things? What is the heart behind it? And most importantly, is my heart right in doing it all? But to be honest, the search was really necessary. The search for the root cause of why we do what we do was necessary. Digging through the motivations, visions, purposes of all it all really helped to form that solid foundation and conviction that Duvall’s character was talking about.
So, the next time a casual comment from an observer of your life begins to rock your world, don’t let it throw you into a pit of confusion. Think about what they said. Examine your motives and actions in the deepest parts. Look for that foundation. If they’re right, then thank them for teaching you something. If they’re wrong, perhaps you should still thank them–for making you think and making your foundation, your conviction stronger so that you can stand in confidence the next time that “casual comment” comes along.
I would love to hear your experience and your best advice for dealing with this scenario…please share in the comments!
PS: Not to worry, I do have some pictures to get up for you soon!